Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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