How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
