Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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