ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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