at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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