Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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