you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
