I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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