Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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