THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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