Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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