Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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