Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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