You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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