please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
