I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
