I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize