I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
