Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
