why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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