well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
