i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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