I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I am never drinking with the goths again.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
