they need to just BURY HIM!
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
