who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
