No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
