This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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