Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
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