sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
So many bounce houses so little time
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
My ass is underappreciated
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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