For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
