I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
