i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
