is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
