I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
