he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
