i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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