Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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