Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
