when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
