If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
