I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm sobbing to NWA
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
