The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
