Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
