please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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