dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
