just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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