Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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