Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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