Sry I called you an 8
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
