y did u give ur computer a hand job?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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